Easy to Please.

My Birthday is coming up soonish.

(No, I am not going to tell you when.)

(I like to capitalize the word Birthday.)

My kids are already talking about it, so I suppose it's okay if I talk about it too.

( I love how for kids the ultimate insult and act of unfriendshipness is to loudly declare

"You can't come to my birthday!")

(The whole day, not just the party.)

Just so you know, I will be turning 23 again.

(No! I am not going to tell you how many times I have turned 23.)
I like age 23 - it's my favorite.

I have started a birthday wish list for all of my loved ones for easy reference:

*Melissa Rycroft's abs.

(From Dancing With the Stars/Formerly from the Bachelor - but it is her DWTS abs that I request - they are much improved, no?)
*If they are not available, I will take Edyta Sliwinska's.

No Prob.
*A view of the ocean from my backyard, like when I used to live in California.
*And also from my bathroom window please.
*A third arm.

Removable - so when I'm not so busy I can take it off for aesthetics.
*A remote control with a mute button that works on rude people.

And on whiners.
*Non-Fat, 0-Carb, Negative Calorie, In-Everyway-Harmless-But-With-The-Same-Taste-And-Sinful-Quality Cheesecake.
*The real Johnny Depp.

Just to look at.

*Oh, and there's that holdover request for the magic wand from last year...

I tried to provide both plenty of notice and lots of choices so as not to be difficult.